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Hello all,
I have been thinking long and hard about what intellect I should share with you, and yet, I have come to the inevitable conclusion that I have none. Unfortunately excessive education has leeched intelligence from me and stubbed out all creativity of carefree childhood. It’s a shame that my first post has been inspired by something so dark and tragic as my current living situation, but I have been advised by authorities that this is a safe space to vent and mope.

Let me share with you a little story about what happened tonight. Prissy little miss landlady (mind you she attempts to salvage the little miss in herself to no avail – fighting age is always a losing battle) came knocking on my door saying “I don’t understand why you need to sleep with the fan on all night if you are blanketing yourself”. She looks at me with a very justified look on her face and blinks a couple times. I am completely taken aback and unsure of how to respond for several obvious reasons – I also stare at her, with more of a blank look and blink a couple times. She blabs on about the utility bills as though I should care about them. I do a quick mental check; yes utilities ARE included in my rent, and rent is WAY more than enough to cover the bills she is quoting plus plenty leftover.
As she continues to blab, my anxiety and frustration builds while a little scuffle goes on in my head deciding how to appropriately react to this. I want to be nice, but then that’s been the game plan since moving in and playing ‘yes-woman’ appears to be ineffective in letting her know how ridiculous she’s being. Should I be a little more assertive, maybe yell a little, show a little bit of colour? But then, it’s best not to aggravate her. I do not like conflict or dealing with yucky negative vibes, especially when I have to live with it.

As always, the peacekeeper in me takes over and in a very calm and matter-of- fact tone, I respond “Well. It’s because I fall asleep with the fan on, and don’t wake up until the morning to turn off the fan”. To which she responds, “Do you need to fall asleep with the fan on when it’s so cool outside?” And I repeat that well, it’s hot when i go to sleep so I do… But maybe you can Try sleeping with the fan off… … … you can imagine the very civilized but strained back-and-forth dialogue that ensued. Am I really having this conversation? REALLY? Mind you, all this is said with her sickly patronizing tone and that pretentiously fake diplomacy in her voice. I give in and agree. I shut the door and feel a little uncertain if I should scream or cry. It’s tough holding in anger and frustration while keeping a relatively neutral expression and tone of voice.
So tomorrow morning I am expecting her to be listening outside my door while I sleep, to hear if the fan is still on and if so, maybe even opening the door to peep in to see if I am blanketing myself. How pleasant. When she goes downstairs she will find a lovely letter from my housemate and I requesting a house meeting when she gets home from work. It’s time to pull out the big guns and quote what’s mandated in the contract. Perhaps express the discomfort I experience when she chastises us like 5-year-olds every day. Hopefully she will choke to death on her saliva while she sleeps and none of this will even be necessary.
P.s. I have so many more rants on this issue, but for your reading pleasure I shall attempt at more lighthearted posts in the future =)

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