Archive for the ‘Profanities of Life’ Category

Year after year, I make plans. Big plans. Big dreams. I’ve always got a whole plan written out on how am i going to achieve them. Cause I have this feeling, that I’m special. That I’m born to make a difference. And this year, i made a bigger deal about new year resolutions. I even spoke about it, my best speech ever.

I wanna see less suffering, more joy. I wanna hear less cries, more laughter. I wanna feel less regret, more gratitude. And yes, I’m all set to achieve this.

But what happens when the preacher herself doesn’t follow her very own preaching? When she gets too tired to do everything she was set out to do, which is really great ideas but just not close enough to become a reality? What happens when big dreams ends up as disappointment?

I sat out this year, with this sailboat. Had the map. Had the compass. The wind was perfect for sailing. Spectacular. I achieved more than I ever did, and i became even more thirsty for this accomplishment feel. Then, something came along the line. The turmoil began. I forgot about the compass. Just had the strength to glance at the map, thinking, what if my plans did work out, would i be where i wanted to be?


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There’s always a guilty feeling when you see someone else’s blog and you realise you haven’t been writing on yours. It’s as though if you have a blog, you MUST write and maintain it. Heck, does anybody even read the shit that i write up here? maybe, i don’t know. But i’m not gonna be having the guilty feeling of not blogging. I’m just gonna have to write when i have something to write about!

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Decision Problem

I was thinking about this for quite a while, people make terrible decisions about the future sometimes, for example you can find yourself watching people consistently dealing with things with such uncertainty, the evidence is then potrayed all around you. Then, others make decisions with some kind of risk and overestimating others.

Now, surely there has to be some way were we can think of  using intuition in a brighter perspective?!

Of course, mistakes are systematic and predictable in certain aspects, but one common cause of problems in decision making is over-optimism. whether its matters of love, jobs or simple homework. people love to exaggerate their own skills and prowess and overestimate the capacity they have over a certain subject of life, forgetting about luck and chalking up success solely to skill, worst of all, they tend to forget that they have to judge their skill against those of similar competition (other people!)

Right, so I have a problem myself, it occurs time to time and its called stubbornness. I do not like to abandon a cherished belief and when a decision has been taken, the earlier it was done, the harder it is to abandon it, thus making me difficult to admit when I have made a mistake. If things do not work, then crying over spilt milk is just a waste of time, as so often it will colour your perception about your future!

Ever so often, we human beings tend to put a lot of emphasis on things that we have seen or experienced ourselves, which may not be the best guide to decision making, so buddies, learn to diversify your ideas and thoughts and learn to adjust when your thoughts are off-balance!

We are what we think. All that we are arises With our thoughts. With our thoughts, We make our world.

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Just like every other new year, for as long as I can remember, I stood beside my mother.

I hear the Indian tablas playing in the background, as a girl’s sweet voice accompanies the melody, singing devotional songs.

People of every age, dressed in traditional clothes raises up their hands, bow their head as they enter the temple and pray.

Little children running around, are stopped and told to behave by their parents.

The scent of flowers, milk and incense linger my senses.

I keep looking around…

For some reason, all I saw was pretentious people.

Instantly, I felt bad for thinking in such manner. Abishtu! I’m in a temple, I shouldn’t be thinking such a way. Just because I can’t concentrate and pray, I’m accusing others.

But… that thought kept lingering. Something is not right in here.

I felt some are just “praying” for the sake of it. Maybe they feel prayers could wash away their sins, or they feel it’s their duty. I don’t know. But I somehow can’t sense humility, gratitude and love here, in a place where it is supposed to be the closest to God.

Many people have been brought up in a society where they fear God. “God is watching your every step. If you do not pray, he’s gonna punish you!”

I was not brought up that way, and I definitely can’t understand why someone would think in such manner!

Would God, the ultimate power that created every single microscopic detail, to every element of the universe (which our minds can’t even comprehend how large it is) be angry and punish me, if I do not offer him flowers and fruits and chant mantras?

I heard someone say once, “If God truly decides to punish u, he could do it in such a way you couldn’t even possibly imagine in your wildest dreams – incidents like tsunami would be just be the icing on the cake”.

Human beings have manipulated religion to their own benefit. And others are just “devotionally” tagging along without any consciousness. I mean, I can’t understand how ridicules people can get!

I’m not against religion or God here. Please don’t mistake me but it’s just the people, and how their mind can work.

Ever since I was young, I was an out-cast in my extended family because I don’t know how to sing devotional songs and I do not go to temple and pray. I admit, even now, I don’t know the right method to pray.

But has that made me any lesser as a human being? No, I don’t think so.

Do I believe in God? Of course, yes. But I certainly do not believe in this drama that most people act out.

The holy place of prayer becomes a central spot for gossiping. I’ve seen it in so many temples, churches where people ridicule each other.

They go faithfully and pray every morning but they fail to respect another human being. They donate (a good thing, yes) but they do not feel the slightest empathy for someone who’s in pain. They seem to know all the mantras to chant, but they must have forgotten their manners in the process.

It saddens me…

I look up at Lord Ganesh and the prayers are almost done. I close my eyes and I inhale deeply.

I pray. For inspiration, for strength and I pray for love.

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Looking up right into the wide starry sky at night,I was wondering what life is all about….from the day i was born,from the day i could eat,crawl,then talk,walk…from the day i started school…then high school and finally now college……then what??graduate??get a job??get a wife??kids??then see them grow up and that actually reminds me about my time those days??then wait for my time to leave this wonderful life??is that all??IS THAT ALL LIFE IS ALL ABOUT??

Well..different people have different ideas,different perceptions,different opinions about life!!looking at the sky…I wondered and thought, my life could just end in a split second!! Its how we make life interesting or extraordinary,wonderful and happening..yet some are suffering.They do that by taking life easily with lots of risks and treating life like a trash!!

Some say..it takes a life long journey to know or understand life!!well,here’s my idea about life…


Life’s not about how much cash you have,not about how hot your girlfriend or boyfriend is…life’s not bout you being famous or infamous..life’s not bout winning or loosing,life’s not about what dress are you going to wear for a prom…its also not about how much you can flirt or play with someone…its not about how you treat your parents..or respect them..its also not bout pouring all your responsibility or priority on someone!!

LIFE is basically all about how you make an impact on other peoples life unless your the only one living on earth!!

Everybody has only one life to live with…nobody gets two or more…we obviously don’t know whats beyond or whats after life!!people talk about heaven and hell or life after eternity….have you seen heaven with your own eyes??or hell??we don’t know what awaits us..its just the trust and believe we have that keeps us running!!

So peeps out there…..make life as mindblowing as possible..like i said earlier..its all about how you make an impact on other people that they will always treasure those moments they had with you for ages!!

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